Tonight I find myself watching public television again. And like last week the dear Rabbis representing the Hasidic Institute of Virginia are slowly converting me to Judaism. Sneaky bastards. Truth be told I think I have weird attraction to men in religious uniforms. (I blame my mom for this, don't ask why.) Abba help me! I beg the Lord to show mercy on this poor soul going to hell for impure thoughts. My goodness I can't even try to be Jewish because my Catholic guilt kicks in. Damn!